Sometimes it can be easy to think I’m doing You a favour by giving something to You, whether that be my time, my treasure or my talent.  I don’t express it quite like this but deep down I often feel like I want some special recognition for whatever I’ve given.  The truth is that everything I have is a gift from You to start with.  I’m only giving back what was Yours to start with.  Anything I give should be out of a sense of overwhelming gratitude that You’ve entrusted me with so much and let me enjoy it.

Thank You for everything I have – help me to use it in a way tha pleases You.

When I’ve finished a job I like to sit back and relax for a while before starting the next one.  That’s fine when I’m at home and I’ve just finished some sort of household chore.  If I adopted that attitude at work though I’d soon find myself on the wrong end of a disciplinary hearing.  How do I treat my walk with You?  Is it a hobby, that I pick up and put down when I feel like it?  Is it a series of chores that I do occasionally, with a nice long rest after completion of each one?  Or is it my whole life’s aim to do Your work and to keep doing it?

I think I’ve got a long way to go.  Help me Lord to put Your will above my comfort.

I’ve read the parable of the prodigal son countless times.  I’ve learned a lot about grace from it. I’ve learned a lot about jealousy and about religious  attitudes.  The older son highlights the latter points.  The new thing I noticed today was that the older son was nowhere around when his father was running off to meet the younger brother.  He was out working in the field, doing what he thought would please his father, grumbling about the lack of attention he was getting for all his hard work.  Is it possible that he totally misread what his father cared about?  His father wasn’t concerned about the farm, he was looking out for his lost son.  If the older son had really wanted his father’s love and favour, maybe he should have found out what mattered most to him and poured all his energies into that – finding and welcoming the lost.  Forget the ‘vital’ farmwork and concentrate on the priceless people.

I’m so far away from that, always caught up in tasks rather than people.  Help me Lord to avoid bitterness by throwing my energies into what matters to You.

3  Yet…

I love the honesty of the Psalms.  When things are going badly, the authors don’t try and pretend that everything’s fine and it’s all a matter of outlook and positive mental attitude.  They tell it like it is.  If life stinks, they say so.  If You feel distant, they don’t pretend You feel close.

Yet…

… there is an unshakeable belief that You are God, that You’ve proved Yourself before and are capable of doing so again, that You are the only hope when the situation is hopeless.  Lord give me the honesty to be real about how I’m feeling and not pretend I’m always ‘fine’.  Give me the certainty that no matter how I feel, You never change.

So simple – the person leading the music understood music.  Often, in churches in particular, the person doing a task is the one who has a vague interest in it, who thinks they have a calling to do it, who thinks they have a right to it, who has some talent at it or who was simply the slowest one to run away from it!  This verse suggests that there should be something beyond these reasons: understanding.  Chenaniah wasn’t just a great musician.  Actually the passage doesn’t even say if he was a great musician.  He had the passion and dedication to really get to know his craft and, from that position, he could lead others in it.  He didn’t really on natural talent – he developed his gifts and learned the theory underpinning what he was doing.

Sometimes it feels like taking the time to study and fully understand what I’m doing could be seen as falling back too much on human wisdom.  Sometimes there is a stated reliance on ‘the move of the Spirit’ which is really a cover for a lack of understanding and a lack of desire to develop the gifts we’ve been given.  I want to take the roles I have and fulfil them to the highest level I can, learning from those with greater experience and taking time to analyse what I need to start doing, what I need to stop doing and what I need to continue doing.

Lord, as I seek to develop what gifts you’ve entrusted to me, help me to understand these gifts fully, to use them for You and to help develop others in them, for Your glory.

I’ve read this story of the demon-possessed man before, enjoyed the outcome of deliverance, wondered a little at the pig aspect… and then today I read a footnote that gave me a new perspective.  The presence of a herd of pigs highlights that this was a Gentile region.  This was outside Jesus’ remit.  He had come to the Jews, something He explicitly stated.  When a need was in front of Him though He didn’t draw distinctions – He met the need and delivered the man.

It’s easy to draw lines as to what I will and won’t do.  Sometimes there are good motives behind this, trying to focus my energies on things that I’m gifted and anointed in and avoiding those that other people are better suited for.  Sometimes though I just need to meet the need that’s staring me in the face.  If Jesus didn’t draw boundaries when it came to dispensing grace then neither should I.

Help me Lord to see the needs right in front of me that you want me to meet.  Give me a heart that is overflowing with Your love and grace.

The ark was a scary object to be around and not to be treated lightly – that much is correct in ‘Raiders of the Lost Ark’.  David had seen a man killed because he reached out and touched it, despite seeming to have good intentions.  This representation of Your presence was deemed to be too dangerous to take home so was left behind with Obed-edom (I’m not sure whether this was willingly or as ordered by the king).  By walking away from Your holiness David was safe but he also missed out on months of blessing.  He let fear of his own sinfulness overcome his fear of You.

The lesson to me here is to take You seriously, to live with a right view of Your holiness, to acknowledge how far short I fall and how merciful You are to me.  In Your presence, with proper respect and awe, comes the blessing.  You’re not safe but You are good.

We’re left in no doubt that this woman who approached Jesus was not a ‘good’ person.  She’s described twice directly as a sinner.  Jesus describes her sins as ‘many’ .  He didn’t forgive her because of her good works, because of her efforts to straighten her life out or because of her religious acts.  He didn’t forgive her because He didn’t know her full story, as Simon the Pharisee thought.  He knew everything about her past, everything she’d ever done wrong, every mistake or act of wilful rebellion.  His forgiveness was based on knowing everything – and forgiving everything.

I sometimes forget that there’s no fooling You.  No matter how good I may try and act, you know what’s really going on.  And You love me and forgive me even with that full knowledge.  It makes no sense at all.  I’m left in a state of bewildered gratitude yet again.

The centurion in this story provides a model of how to ask for something from Jesus.

Humbly – he didn’t feel worthy to approach Jesus directly.  He didn’t feel worthy to have Jesus in his house.  Neither of these stopped him asking though.

Putting others first – he went outside of his comfort zone and his sphere of influence, lowering himself from his position of power, for his servant.  He didn’t ask for himself but for an insignificant employee or slave that he didn’t have to care about.

Directly – there was no doubt what the centurion wanted.  He asked Jesus to let his servant be healed.  No religious language, no long preamble, just straight to the point.

With faith – there was no doubt in his mind that Jesus could heal the servant.  The centurion recognised that sickness was as much under Jesus’ command as a soldier was under his.  Once ordered, it must obey.

So simple – why must I always make things complicated?  Lord help me to be humble, selfless, direct and full of faith.

I’d hate to think that someone is making snap decisions about me, thinking badly of me over one mistake I once made, writing me off, holding a grudge against me, deciding I’m not good enough, categorising me, looking down on me.  In short, I don’t want other people to treat me the way I treat them.  I’m guilty of most of these things on a daily basis and I’m particularly guilty of not applying the same standards to myself that I do to others.

Judgement and condemnation aren’t my decisions to make.  I’m at least as deserving of them as the next person.  Instead, for reasons I’ll never fully get my head around, I’ve been forgiven.  It’s up to me to pass on what I’ve received – not judgement but mercy.

Thank You Lord that You act towards me out of love, not condemnation.  Let this flow out of me in how I act towards other people.